The Sibbals

Success is in their blood

Sibal family.

This is a story that has its origins in Dingah village of Gujarat district in Pakistan, when 18-year-old Hira Lal Sibal married 14-year-old Kailash Rani of Bhimbar which is now a part of PoK. Mr Sibal went on to practice in the Punjab High Court in Lahore where his five children were born. Partition forced them out of their home in Lahore. Mr Sibal is nostalgic when he says, “We shifted from Lahore to Jalandhar, hoping that we would be able to return to our home after conditions improved. But that was not to be, so we moved to Shimla, and then when the Punjab and Haryana High Court shifted to Chandigarh in 1955, we did too”.

Sibal’s reputation as an advocate specialising in civil, criminal and election law is well-founded. He has been Advocate-General four times and was elected as the first non-official president of the Chandigarh Club, Rotary Club. He has been president of the High Court Bar Association twice.

Mr Sibal’s eldest son, V.K. Sibal, qualified for the IAS and opted for a UN deputation with the FAO. He is presently a judge with the Punjab Human Rights Commission. J.K. Sibal also qualified for the IAS and was assigned the MP cadre. After 18 years, he quit to return to legal practice in Chandigarh and is presently an advocate of repute.

Kanwal Sibal qualified for the IFS and rose to become India’s Foreign Secretary. He has recently been appointed Ambassador to Russia. The youngest Kapil Sibal also qualified for the IAS but chose the legal profession and went on to become a reputed Supreme Court advocate before he joined the Congress and is now a minister. Mr Sibal’s only daughter Asha is married to the former MD of Metalbox and former Chairman of BATA.

Mr Sibal’s wife, Kailash Rani, keeps a beautiful home and garden in Sector 5, Chandigarh. She has a photographic memory and follows a disciplined schedule, “Discipline is the quality I passed on to my children”, she says. Excerpts from an interview given to Bilawal and Punam Khaira Sidhu:

You must be a very proud father. What inspired your children to join the civil services ?

V.K. Sibal qualified for the IAS and set the trend for the others. I am indeed very proud of all of them as they are all good humans.

Were all of your son’s good at studies and academically inclined at an early age?

Yes, they all excelled in academics. I rarely had to tell them to study. They were all very motivated youngsters, who I knew would succeed in whatever they chose to do.

What schools did they go to?

They have studied at various schools and colleges in Shimla, Chandigarh and Ludhiana as we shifted from Shimla to Chandigarh. The youngest, Kapil, studied in St Johns and then moved on to St Stephens College in Delhi.

What were your sons interests/hobbies?

V.K. was an avid reader. There is hardly a book or an author he has not read. J.K. and Kanwal excelled in debates etc while Kapil was an all-rounder excelling in sports, dramatics and a cinema enthusiast.

Was there a lot of sibling rivalry?

Yes, but it was healthy and that is why each has tried to set the bar.

What are the qualities you ascribe to their success?

My wife and I tried to imbibe the qualities of discipline, honesty and perseverence in all of them.

How much has Chandigarh changed since you first moved here?

The changes have been dramatic. Chandigarh was a city of barely one lakh population and today it is over 10 lakh. It is dirty, polluted and crowded. The civic infrastructure and law and order set-up is under tremendous pressure.

What improvements would you like to see in the city?

Planned development of the periphery and satellite cities of Mohali and Panchkula can ease the pressure on Chandigarh. Each resident also needs to be aware of his civic responsibility to keep the city beautiful.

What is your message for the youth?

Work with sincerity and honesty to achieve your goals. Let it be like an obsession and you will achieve great results. As for the rest, destiny also determines your fate.

Valentines Day Introspection

Rites de Passage: a post-Valentine’s Day introspection
Punam Khaira Sidhu

THERE was consternation in my brother’s home this Valentine’s Day. My cute teenaged niece couldn’t make up her mind about what to wear. Was is it going to be the red mini or the red trousers with the mini top. Choices, choices, choices! “Well whatever it’s going to be, it’s got to be red, with lots of skin showing” she said, as her father glowered menacingly. As she sat debating clothes with a set of cute, confused young girlfriends and her indulgent mom, I couldn’t help reflecting on how times had changed.

Red the colour of Karl Marx, and socialism is today the colour of all that represents capitalism: Coke, Cable TV and Valentine’s Day. A festival associated with a pagan ritual, the cruel King Claudius, and a tender-hearted priest named Valentine, has fusilladed into the latest icon for our consumer society. It is fuelled by card companies, soft toy manufacturers, candy, coke and assorted clothing manufacturers. They have clogged the channels on TV for the past month. The so-called Youth Channels, MTV and Channel V, the Star and Zee networks, Sony and even “sada” Punjabi channels such as Punjab Today and Alpha Punjabi were full of barely clad young things, espousing the cause of Saint Valentine.

Saint Valentine’s Day traces its roots to a pagan ritual associated with the feast of Lupercalia, commemorating young men’s rites of passage to the heathen god Lupercus. In ancient Rome, February 14 was the feast of the goddess Juno, who is associated with marriage and women. The next day i.e. February 15 would begin the celebrations for the Feast of Lupercalia. The lives of young boys and girls at that time were strictly segregated. One of the rituals associated with this festival was the drawing of names of Roman girls by boys out of a jar with a slot. The boy would then have, as a companion, the girl whose name he drew, for the rest of the festival. Sometimes these young ones married. Thus started the custom of young men selecting young women for Valentines.

At around this time, Emperor Claudius II of Rome was engaged in bloody battles. He found recruiting men into his army Leagues very difficult. Over a period of time, he began to believe that it was because men did not want to leave their wives and families. He, therefore, banned marriages and engagements. Valentine was a priest in Rome, in the days of “cruel Claudius II”, who married couples secretly. For this, he was sentenced to death by beating him with clubs and to have his head cut off. He suffered martyrdom, in the year 270 on the 14th day of February. Later the Christian Church in an attempt to do away with the pagan rituals in the Feast of Lupercalia, substituted the name of maidens with that of Saints. Pope Gelasius ordered this change in the lottery custom. Thus began the ritual of young men selecting Saints, as patrons, whose lives they would try to emulate during the coming year.

Out of the tradition for men to give girls they admired handwritten messages of affection with Saint Valentine’s name in it, emerged the present day Valentine cards. The first true Valentine card was sent in 1415 by a Frenchman, Charles, Duke of Orleans, to his wife, from the Tower of London, where he was imprisoned after the Battle of Agincourt. It was thought that birds also chose their mate for the year on February 14. Pigeons and doves are birds which mate for life and, therefore, came to be used as a symbol of “fidelity.”

Today, America celebrates this day with fervour. In terms of cards sent, it is ranked second in popularity only to Christmas. Children make a decorated box with a slot in the top for the Valentine’s day party at school. During the party, they slip valentines into their classmates’ Valentines’ Box. The first US made valentines called “Worcester valentines were crafted in the 1830s by a college student named Esther Howland. John McLaughlin, a New York printer, created the “Vinegar valentines”. These comic valentines were printed on cheap paper in bright colours and made fun of old maids and others. American cartoonist Charles Howard also popularised what were called “Penny dreadfuls” — comic cards with dreadful designs which sold for a penny.

There’s a Valentine day card for everyone — parents, sweethearts, spouses, teacher and even your dog! Cards, flowers especially the ubiquitous red rose, candy, perfume et all wrapped in red with glitter and long-suffering hearts pierced with arrows were favourite Valentine Day gifts.

The departmental stores of the city beautiful added wine, cheese and munchies to the list, this year. In the schools, the nuns and brothers and other principals had counselled their charges to show restraint.

The cops had geared up for where the real action was to be: “the geri route”. But the real dilemma was my niece’s and that of every nubile young thing: “What if they didn’t get a single valentine?” The even greater dilemma was that of cautious parents: “How to deal with rampant young teenaged hormones as they tried to do what advertisements and commercials expected of them?”!

Well, Valentine’s Day came and went. There were some hits and some misses. Cupids arrows have a way of finding their mark. My little niece and her friends also collected a lot of valentines but they showed restraint and came straight home after college for an all girls bash. My brother was a happy father this Valentine’s Day as he reflected, “At the end of the day family values and socialisation i.e. “sanskars”, still do matter. Not all the temptations and satellite TV can take that away from us”.

Valentines Day Introspection

Rites de Passage: a post-Valentine’s Day introspection
Punam Khaira Sidhu

THERE was consternation in my brother’s home this Valentine’s Day. My cute teenaged niece couldn’t make up her mind about what to wear. Was is it going to be the red mini or the red trousers with the mini top. Choices, choices, choices! “Well whatever it’s going to be, it’s got to be red, with lots of skin showing” she said, as her father glowered menacingly. As she sat debating clothes with a set of cute, confused young girlfriends and her indulgent mom, I couldn’t help reflecting on how times had changed.

Red the colour of Karl Marx, and socialism is today the colour of all that represents capitalism: Coke, Cable TV and Valentine’s Day. A festival associated with a pagan ritual, the cruel King Claudius, and a tender-hearted priest named Valentine, has fusilladed into the latest icon for our consumer society. It is fuelled by card companies, soft toy manufacturers, candy, coke and assorted clothing manufacturers. They have clogged the channels on TV for the past month. The so-called Youth Channels, MTV and Channel V, the Star and Zee networks, Sony and even “sada” Punjabi channels such as Punjab Today and Alpha Punjabi were full of barely clad young things, espousing the cause of Saint Valentine.

Saint Valentine’s Day traces its roots to a pagan ritual associated with the feast of Lupercalia, commemorating young men’s rites of passage to the heathen god Lupercus. In ancient Rome, February 14 was the feast of the goddess Juno, who is associated with marriage and women. The next day i.e. February 15 would begin the celebrations for the Feast of Lupercalia. The lives of young boys and girls at that time were strictly segregated. One of the rituals associated with this festival was the drawing of names of Roman girls by boys out of a jar with a slot. The boy would then have, as a companion, the girl whose name he drew, for the rest of the festival. Sometimes these young ones married. Thus started the custom of young men selecting young women for Valentines.

At around this time, Emperor Claudius II of Rome was engaged in bloody battles. He found recruiting men into his army Leagues very difficult. Over a period of time, he began to believe that it was because men did not want to leave their wives and families. He, therefore, banned marriages and engagements. Valentine was a priest in Rome, in the days of “cruel Claudius II”, who married couples secretly. For this, he was sentenced to death by beating him with clubs and to have his head cut off. He suffered martyrdom, in the year 270 on the 14th day of February. Later the Christian Church in an attempt to do away with the pagan rituals in the Feast of Lupercalia, substituted the name of maidens with that of Saints. Pope Gelasius ordered this change in the lottery custom. Thus began the ritual of young men selecting Saints, as patrons, whose lives they would try to emulate during the coming year.

Out of the tradition for men to give girls they admired handwritten messages of affection with Saint Valentine’s name in it, emerged the present day Valentine cards. The first true Valentine card was sent in 1415 by a Frenchman, Charles, Duke of Orleans, to his wife, from the Tower of London, where he was imprisoned after the Battle of Agincourt. It was thought that birds also chose their mate for the year on February 14. Pigeons and doves are birds which mate for life and, therefore, came to be used as a symbol of “fidelity.”

Today, America celebrates this day with fervour. In terms of cards sent, it is ranked second in popularity only to Christmas. Children make a decorated box with a slot in the top for the Valentine’s day party at school. During the party, they slip valentines into their classmates’ Valentines’ Box. The first US made valentines called “Worcester valentines were crafted in the 1830s by a college student named Esther Howland. John McLaughlin, a New York printer, created the “Vinegar valentines”. These comic valentines were printed on cheap paper in bright colours and made fun of old maids and others. American cartoonist Charles Howard also popularised what were called “Penny dreadfuls” — comic cards with dreadful designs which sold for a penny.

There’s a Valentine day card for everyone — parents, sweethearts, spouses, teacher and even your dog! Cards, flowers especially the ubiquitous red rose, candy, perfume et all wrapped in red with glitter and long-suffering hearts pierced with arrows were favourite Valentine Day gifts.

The departmental stores of the city beautiful added wine, cheese and munchies to the list, this year. In the schools, the nuns and brothers and other principals had counselled their charges to show restraint.

The cops had geared up for where the real action was to be: “the geri route”. But the real dilemma was my niece’s and that of every nubile young thing: “What if they didn’t get a single valentine?” The even greater dilemma was that of cautious parents: “How to deal with rampant young teenaged hormones as they tried to do what advertisements and commercials expected of them?”!

Well, Valentine’s Day came and went. There were some hits and some misses. Cupids arrows have a way of finding their mark. My little niece and her friends also collected a lot of valentines but they showed restraint and came straight home after college for an all girls bash. My brother was a happy father this Valentine’s Day as he reflected, “At the end of the day family values and socialisation i.e. “sanskars”, still do matter. Not all the temptations and satellite TV can take that away from us”.